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Tonight we move onto #4 on the most-hated list for DMV fans: Boston. It's really easy picking to complain about Boston, but we're willing to take the obvious shots. Boston makes the list more on fan reputation and recent success than rivalry for those of us in the DMV. Regardless...I can't freaking stand Boston, and neither should you.
Rivalry
Let's just say there is no Yankees-like hate between these two cities. The Bruins and Caps get one point for their recent success and some really solid games lately (most notably the game ending with Alex Semin's late blueline bomb). The Celtics and Wizards get one point because the Wizards have been a bit of a thorn in Boston's side in recent years, despite being absolutely terrible against the rest of the league (2 points). The Patriots and Bill Belichick can go to hell for running the score up on Joe Gibbs a couple years back too.
Success
This one is pretty self-explanatory. The Red Sox have two championships this decade. They were once the lovable losers and everyone jumped on their bandwagon. Now they win and you have to hear about them all the time (2 points). The Celtics brought in outside stars and won a championship two years ago, and we all had to listen to excessive Lakers/Celtics 80s talk. That got old fast, like all Boston sports (2 points). The Patriots are a bunch of cheaters, but they have three rings this decade, and Tom Brady is an all-time great. Boo (2 points). The Bruins are the only team without a ring, but they managed to beat the Caps out for the no. 1 seed last season in the Eastern Conference (1 point).
Loyalty
Let me give a story here (and Ben, I apologize in advance, but I have to pick on you). Back in 2004, I was a freshman at Virginia Tech. During the ALCS that year, I was happy to root against the Yankees because, well, I hate the Yankees (don't confuse this with rooting FOR the Red Sox). I knew the guy down the hall from me (who ended up as my roommate two years later) was from Worcester, and was supposedly a big Saaawx fan, mostly because he wore his hat everywhere. Right after A-Rod's ball slap in the eighth inning, I ran down the hall to talk to him and he was sitting at his desk working on homework. I looked at the T.V. and it was off. I asked him why the game wasn't on, and he responded with "oh, that's tonight?" That says it all right there.
Temperament
Baaaaaaaaaaaahston fans are easily among the worst of the worst in this area. Not only do they fail to pronounce their 'r's, but they always drink excessively and start fights. If you can find a non-bandwagon fan (and it's not easy), they'll start telling you about how they're still a bunch of lovable losers and everyone should love their favorite teams (4 points). If they don't pull that, they'll be incredibly conceited and tell you about how D.C. is a dump and New England is God's gift to the world.
Fan Travel
Considering the Nats had to make special accommodations to ticket packages last year to make money off of Boston fans, this should be a no brainer, but they're pretty much non-existent when it comes to any other sport (0 points).
Team Total: 16 Points
How to Survive a Boston Encounter
Ask the person if they have a speech impediment. If that doesn't set them off, call Bill Belichick a cheater, tell them their Super Bowls are a fraud, or remind them how many championships the Yankees have. If none of that works, remind them that Ray Bourque hoisted the Cup with the Avs. That should sting.
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